A Separation of Fitness and Food

As I’m reading Intuitive Eating, 3rd Edition cover to cover I’m falling more and more in love with it.

Today has been successful with food. I found out my Grandma passed away in the night shortly before 8am. The first thing I wanted to do was eat, but I asked myself if I was hungry or upset. Upset was the answer. I waited until I felt it in my stomach at 9:20am. I ate then and stopped eating when I realized it didn’t taste as good and my stomach wasn’t asking for more. I ate a banana, a little peanut butter and some oatmeal. I ate most, threw some away and felt satiated. That’s a success for me.

Intuitive Eating emphasizes the need to separate your food relationship from your fitness relationship, as often the two go hand in hand. I can’t agree more than that.

I am trying to disentangle the web I’ve weaved where my exercise and food intake have some abusive, co-dependent relationship. I want to exercise because it feels good and I honestly enjoy it, not because I’m expecting a pay off on the scale.

The only time I’ve come close to this is while triathlon training. When training I actually enjoy working out, but I can’t help but wonder if it’s because much like losing weight, there is some end goal that I’m trying to meet. The key word there is just that, END. I want to find a relationship with exercise where it’s ingrained in me as part of a daily routine, not me just trying to get to the end.

I can be a damn good wacko while dieting and do all of the things that go with it: restricted eating, timed eating, limited eating, emotional eating, over exercise, guilty exercising, injured exercising.

I’m sick of this dieting mentality.

Dieting? You’re damn right I’m exercising: running, swimming, biking…nutjob style.

Not dieting? Screw working out. What’s the point?

What’s the point? WHAT’S THE POINT, CHUBBY BUNNY?! I feel SO MUCH better when I keep working out. That’s the point! I sleep better, I breathe better, my immune system is a million times better, I exude confidence. The list goes on and on. I only ever stop exercising when my diet cycle deems so: diet, exercise, not quick enough results, frustration, quit…wash, rinse, repeat.

I work out like a beast for a week and weigh in – see no scale change…lose my mind and flip a table: (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻)

I think to myself that maybe it’s my body figuring it out. So, I work out for another week like a beast, get pumped up about it but there is only a TINY scale change…so… I flip two tables instead of one: ┻━┻ ︵ ¯\(ツ)/¯ ︵ ┻━┻

I would like to get to a point where there is no table flipping and I work out because it just makes me feel good. What about you?

12 thoughts on “A Separation of Fitness and Food

  1. I’m so sorry for your loss.
    That being said. I think it is amazing that you are able to separate the need for food as an emotional tie vs one of need.

    When I began my own journey I realized that using the word diet was going to inherently make me fail. So I renamed what I’m doing. I’m getting healthy. Your getting healthy, not dieting. Your working out because you want to be strong and have a healthier body. Your eating better foods for the same reason.

    It looks like your well on your way to the saying… Eat to Live and not Live to Eat.

    Welcome back and keep rocking it.

  2. Thank you. I’m trying to learn to separate the need. This will definitely be a work in progress for me. And yes, I’m trying to learn to ditch the word “diet.” I just can’t anymore. It’s exhausting and defeating.

    Thanks for commenting. ❤

  3. I’m so sorry to hear your news (((HUG))).

    I really think that I need to get hold of a copy of ‘Intuitive eating’ as it sounds like just what I need to read and learn. It’s clearly had a big impact on you and it sounds as if you are making great progress. x

  4. Thank you. Intuitive Eating definitely makes you think about the way you’ve been eating and the whole “dieting” mentality. I’ve needed a better relationship with food for a very long time and this is certainly helping. I’d definitely recommend reading it.

  5. Pingback: “There is no off-season, there is only an IMPROVEMENT season”. | Fat Girl to Ironman

  6. I’ve just started reading this book, and I know exactly where you are coming from!! I had gotten to the point of frustration myself, and then stumbled across the book and am looking forward to working through the whole thing.

  7. Ohh… I’m sorry for your loss..

    But I am glad to hear you’re doing so well with eating now! I need to get to that place too, where I’m able to separate hunger feelings from emotional feelings that put me to eating. Also I need to try to quit eating when I’m bored!
    Keep going sister!!

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  9. Pingback: "There is no off-season, there is only an IMPROVEMENT season". - Fat Girl to Ironman

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