Whose Idea Was This?

Did I piss people off yesterday? You can leave nasty comments too. ūüôā

I don’t know about you, but I really enjoy silence after an excruciating work out. It gives me time to process and take it all in. To be proud of myself, to reconnect. All of that hokey bullshit.

I had just completed cycling for 40 minutes, I’d done close to 11 miles¬†on a level 12, which is nothing for those skinny bitches, but I was fairly certain death was upon me. The sweat is pouring off.¬†Literally¬†pouring off of me. It’s disgusting. I make it back to the locker room with my jello legs and pray to a god that¬†I don’t believe in that I’ll try believing if I just make it back without totally embarrassing myself. So, here I am, bent over, untying my shoe, watching bead after bead of sweat drip off of my nose when I hear her voice,

¬†“Wow…did you just do some aerobics class?”

Fuck fuck fuck….no, not her. Pretend you’re deaf and stare blankly at her, as thought you’re pretending to read lips. Shit! You can’t! You’ve already committed and spoken to her before. Abort mission. Abort mission, “Uhh…no, no I didn’t.”

“So, this is all from just working out?”

“Yes, yes it is.”

“Wow….so…no aerobics?”


I will spare you from every other detailed conversation, but I need you all to know some of things I have experienced with her:

  • One time she busted into my shower demanding to know if I had a hair tie she could borrow. When I told her no she left my shower and went into the locker room. She returned with a hair tie and explained to me that she found it on the ground and didn’t ask anyone if it was their hair tie because it was on the ground and it’s only a stupid rubber band. (Yes, that ridiculous run on sentence was meant to annoy you; it’s how she speaks…) I don’t say a word with the exception of a few “Uh-huhs” and I quickly leave the shower. Wait for it…wait for it… she follows me out. Naked. Just chatting up a storm without me responding. She gets back to the locker room, butt ass naked¬†and then proceeds to ask everyone else in the locker room if she stole their hair tie.
  • She took a shower FULLY DRESSED and spent the entire time talking about how she needs to wear more purple and pink panties. That she needs to “spice it up.”
  • Today she left the locker room totally naked and walked down the hall and dressed next to the pool where she proceeded to swim in clothes.
  • She informed me that she works out 8 hours a day at the gym, but doesn’t actually know how much of that is working out because she talks so much. She proceeded to spend 15 minutes telling me how she talks too much.
  • She brings two suitcases to the gym and sits butt ass naked on the locker room floor. She has like 3 things in each suitcase.
  • I have witnessed her talking to other people that have their headphones on during their workout that 100% ignore her. It appears she talks to herself.

I understand this may sound mean, but fuck, I just needed to vent. She is not just attached to me. She chats up anyone in the vicinity. This girl is not “special” or “slow” or retarded. She’s just fucking weird and too chatty. I have no idea why, but I’m fairly convinced that she must be in some sort of transitional home out of prison or something of the like. I have absolutely NO basis for this thought other than I just think so. Someone should call her parole officer.

I have realized (and am in the process of accepting) that I am a judgey bitch. I judge the shit out of people. It’s absolutely terrible, but I do. I also think it’s fair to say that we all judge people. Upon first meeting someone you make a snap judgement if you’d like to continue interaction with them based one what’s been delivered thus far. Hell, sometimes¬†we don’t even give them the time of day, (yes, that homeless guy on the corner, the random dude hitting un-relentlessly on you, etc.)¬†Could you imagine if we had a¬†mandatory time frame in which we must engage with someone before deciding if it’s something we’d like to continue or not. I imagine it’d go something like this: “Ey girl… lemme holla at you. You gotta mandatory 5 with me, boo.” And then fuck, you’re screwed. You waste 5 minutes staring at your watch because you already know it won’t go anywhere….that is unless of course he somehow manages to convince you he’s a billionaire or some other random lie that you’re dumb enough to believe at the time; followed by obnoxious chatter and then eventually parting ways. Imagine how¬†crime rates would¬†rise. People being forced to engage with serial killers, rapists, etc. “I’d love to run away from you because you’ve really creep the shit out of me, but unfortunately¬†I have to chat with you for¬†5 minutes before¬†deciding if¬†that’s what’s best for me or not!” Sometimes you just know…. I’m not saying don’t give people a chance, but let’s be honest with ourselves, we all judge people. It’s what you do with those judgements.

In other news, I did a brick training session this morning where I biked 8.5 miles and ran 2….I then promptly thought it’d be a brilliant idea to wear 4.5 inch pumps to work. I look hot as hell, but fuck my life.

I weigh in tomorrow so I think I’ll tackle the topic of food. Any requests? ::cricket cricket::

2 thoughts on “Whose Idea Was This?

  1. Holy shit!! God be my witness I have to see a pic of you!! You are me, but I didn’t write this shit! I was literally laughing like a banshee at my desk picturing myself having this same stuff happen to me and thinking the EXACT same thing u did. I judge everyone. Honestly, I feel like I should be getting paid for it as much as I do it. Doesn’t matter who, doesn’t matter where…….damn, I just skimmed over your post again and now I can’t stop laughing. “Check Please……”

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