Damn girl, that's a lot of fattitude

WTF? Black Bean Brownies? I’ve heard of them. I was a skeptic. I thought to myself, “There are two places for black beans – 1. in soup with queso and 2. in a quesadilla.” But lately I’ve been craving sweets like nobodies business so I thought I’d give it a shot. I make bomb brownies. Like, melt in your mouth, fudgey, slutty, nasty good brownies. So, I thought last night, as I was about to open a pint of Ben & Jerry’s while standing in front of the pantry staring at a can of black beans perhaps now was a good time to try this Black Bean “Brownie” thing. I knew there were two possible outcomes: 1. They’d be delicious and I’d get that sweet fix. (since I knew this _was_ an option I decided to do pictures the whole way in case some miracle occurred.) 2. They’d be disgusting and I’d lose all desire for something sweet. I was banking on #2. Because I was banking on #2 I decided to be lazy as lazy could be and take some shortcuts. My big shortcut? I skipped my Beloved KitchenAid Mixer, and I made the whole damn thing in a Food Processor, with one Pyrex Glass Bowl and a Silicone Spatula.
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Involved

Food Processor

1 15oz can of black beans

1 cup of sugar

1/2 cup of cocoa powder

2 eggs

1 stick of butter

1 cup of chocolate chips (divided into 1/2 cups)

2 teaspoons vanilla

1/4 teaspoon baking powder

1/4 teaspoon baking soda

1/4 teaspoon salt

Rinse and drain your black beans like nobodies business. Throw them in a food processor and let them break down into a paste. Dance! Dance for me black beans! Bwahahaha – while this is happening melt 1/2c. of chocolate chips and put them in with the beans and then blend them together to make sweet love.
Melt your butter in the same bowl as your chocolate. There is no damn point in dirtying another dish for clean up. It’s just silly. Unless you get off on that Cinderella crap and want to wash dishes. If that’s the case, go for it. And it doesn’t have to be liquid. If you’ve got room temp butter out use that and it’ll work just fine. Mix the butter, sugar eggs, and vanilla. Here’s a fun fact – most caps on vanilla (even my homemade vanilla) are about 1 teaspoon – so that’s what I use now. Saves one more dirty thing to clean!
Add your cocoa, salt, baking soda, and baking powder and blend together. Do it all at once. I unfortunately, just wasn’t smart enough to do that. Scrape all of your sides down and give it another final run. You want to make sure everything is fully incorporated. No funny business and sneaky black beans randomly appearing. Eff that noise.
Pour into a greased 9×9 pan. Gently stir in the remaining 1/2 cup chocolate chips with the same spatula you’ve been scraping everything down with. (again, unless dishes are your thing.) If you’re feeling frisky go ahead and throw a few chips on the top. Bake at 350 for 25-30 minutes. Take them out and check them. If they’re starting to pull away from the sides a little bit – they’re good to go. If not, keep baking them until they start to pull away.

Oh yeah – that’s the sweet stuff. Man oh man – they are less cake like than my normal brownies, but definitely more fudgey and gooey. So good with milk. SO GOOD.  There wasn’t some crazy taste involved, no weird texture and honestly – I would have never known they had black beans in them. So far, they’re husband approved, as well. I’m taking what’s left to a dinner tonight…if there are any.

5PP – serves 16